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review : deep dish pizza & cherry knot strangers

review : deep dish pizza & cherry knot strangers

In the small town I live in, I’ve had the fortunate luck of being able to have tried every restaurant around, especially those that serve an all-american favorite: pizza. Pizza is the core of my household, my lively hood. It is the dish served when there are no other dishes to have or there are too many to chose from. It is the comfort, the casual and the fancy dining. It is what has in great times of misfortune, brightened the spirits of myself and those closest to me.

Not to far away from my home, there is a nice pizza restaurant that by far has the best pizza I’ve had the fortune of tasting. Cooked for thirty minutes, the pizza is deep-dished with cheese practically melting out, then there’s the sauce; tomatoes and more cheese. It’s the best pizza I’ve ever had. For my first time however dinging at the great Tortuga’s, the name of the best pizza making restaurant, I also met a stranger. She was young, not older then five and had cherries on her shirt and shorts. She has the brightest blue eyes and dark brown hair; she was adorable. All she did was turn around and wave at me, when I waved back, the sound of her laugh was like honey to a bee to my ears. It was a beautiful sound.

I think a lot about that day, about the amazing pizza and the cherry-shirt-girl. I think about how the little girls laugh made my entire good day a great day. We often become caught up in the momentum of becoming busy workers, taking the smallest amount of time to help and recover for ourselves and well-being. It wasn’t really me taking time for myself, it was more of an awakening moment for myself: I’d realized after smiling at the little girl’s laughter, it was the first time a stranger had waved at me, it was the first time anyone had laughed genuinely too, as happy as one could be, in a long time. The sound of her giggle was foreign to me for a moment but gladly welcomed with open arms. Like lightning, I was stuck upon that realization for a few moments, taken aback by it.

So, my lesson learned was that I couldn’t bury myself with work, with school and with all of my responsibilities if I wanted to be happy at the same time. I needed to take time to try new places with amazing food and laugh genuinely in order to be genuinely happy. The cherry knot stranger taught me to smile more at strangers, because you never know when someone might need a good smile from you.

the little things

The Little Things

Life, to put it simply, is tough and rough. It isn’t always a dance, sometimes the music gets loud and noisy. Throughout our journey, we see things that change us and make us who we are, what we’ll become and what we’ll leave behind. That goes for the choices we make too.  Because it can be tough and rough, there are little things that make us happy: the kids playing in the neighborhood with laughter that travels down the road and fills your ears, the birds singing early in the morning with sweet melody, a stranger smiling at you in passing, eating your favorite food, or the radio playing your song. Its those moments of pure innocence that are important.

Little things aren’t just that, though. Life sucks a lot so when small moments of something maybe not happy but definitely not sad, just somewhere where it lifts your spirits. A light, of sorts, in the darkness that keeps your head up and looking forwards. I think we should all be kind, because we tend to think of ourselves, of our problems and of our inconveniences. If you see a kid on the train staring at their feet, in a not so creepily way, complement them. Offer a friend some gum, smile at strangers, be kind.

Everyone goes through difficult times just like yourself, why make it harder on someone else? Why not offer them some assurance of hope through random acts of small bits of kindness?

Being kind to strangers shouldn’t be your top and only priority. You should also treat yourself; and love yourself too. I’m a strong believer in taking breaks. If you’re like me, you use those breaks to sleep or eat or maybe something else like read, write or draw. Maybe you sing or make music, maybe you just sit and stare at a wall. Possibly, you might go for a run, create something or cook. Whatever it is, do it. Take breaks, short or long. Do something for yourself that makes you undeniably happy and gets you away from all of the harsh things.

Write down something every day that made you smile, heck even right down two or three. Do what makes you happy. That’s  what’s important.

feminism & how I see it

feminism (noun)
  the advocacy of women’s rights on the basis of the equality of the sexes.

The definition above is exactly the term I use when people ask me why I am a feminist: because I believe all men and women of any race, religion and/or sexuality belongs to be treated with the same amount of respect, equality and kindness. I believe women have the right to make decisions for their own bodies, not the government. I believe that everyone has a right to love who they want to love, or not love anyone at all (relationship wise). I believe everyone should feel love and be loved. I believe that love is love and we should spread it like wildfire. I believe that people have the right to have rights no matter who they are because of the basic fact that they are humans. I do not believe in violence. I do not believe in hate. I do not believe that men are better than women or that anyone is superior to anyone else based on the color of their skin or their religion or their sexuality. I do not believe in those things that oppress people. Believing such things as this are uncommon in the south, especially where I live but these beliefs are not going anywhere, anytime soon.

I was raised to treat anyone I meet with kindness and love, despite where the come from or who they want to be or what they believe in. To treat those who deserve kindness, love, care, respect and compassion until they no longer deserve it. I won’t lie, I’ve been in some heated discussions about politics or just arguments in general but never to the point where I start to scream obscene things at a person, though I’ve thought deeply about it. We’re going to meet people whose views on things are on opposite ends compared to ours, I’ve learned that the hard way. It doesn’t mean that either one of us wrong, to the extent that the other persons view dehumanizes another person because it won’t be me who does such hateful things.

People are people, and I’ll say it again, they deserve to be treated with equal respect, kindness and justice as anyone else. It shouldn’t matter whether or not a person’s skin is the lightest shade of white or the darkest of brown. It shouldn’t matter whether or not a person is a man or woman. Whether a person is a Christian or Buddhist. If a person wears heavy coats of makeup or none at all. If a person is straight or gay. If a person speaks fluently in one language but not another, no matter where they live. If a person is fat or skinny. If a person is happy with how they look or wants to be changed. At the end of the day, we all make choices; the define us, truly, on who we are, who we want to be and what we will leave behind for them to remember us by. The choices we make affect ourselves the most and in America, we have the right to make choices because we are free. Other countries don’t have that luxury. Hopefully, someday soon, the rest of the world and all of its people can enjoy that freedom to be who they are, practice what they want and be with who they want to be with, without being judged for it and without being put down for it and without living in fear of wanting to be happy for who they are.

I lose respect for those who spread hate, who bring others down for who they are. It is the twenty first century and we are still fighting for the rights of humans of all types. As a strong believer in protesting peacefully for what one believes in, I am proud of my fellow feminists, in people that are strong representations who fight for the same thing I and many others believe in. The tides are shifting and the change is coming, though with a few setbacks of which we will overcome, I can almost see it on the skyline with every new day.

Spread love, friends. People deal with enough as is, we all know this, so why make it harder for someone else to live. Spread love and be respectful. Changing ones lifestyle, going against what others believe in, it is a hard fight. Being who you want to be and opening the door to change is when you deserve to be met with love. Open your eyes and your arms to those who spread hate, and maybe they can change too. The road ahead is long and hard, but when has a journey not been? Lin-Manuel Miranda said it right in his sonnet, a favorite of mine,

“We chase the melodies that seem to find us                                                                                                  Until they’re finished songs and start to play                                                                                                    When senseless acts of tragedy remind us                                                                                                       That nothing here is promised, not one day.                                                                                                  This show is proof that history remembers                                                                                                        We lived through times when hate and fear seemed stronger;                                                                    We rise and fall and light from dying embers, remembrances that hope and love last longer        And love is love is love is love is love is love is love is love cannot be killed or swept aside.                    I sing Vanessa’s symphony, Eliza tells her story                                                                                            Now fill the world with music, love and pride.”

I’m not a feminist because I just believe women and men are equal, but also because people of color, the LGBT+ community, the Jews, the Hindus, the Islam’s and everyone are living in fear for their lives and the ones that they love lives of people who oppress them with sexism, racism, misogyny and too many phobias to count. The people who want to see them either as wrong and sinners or just gone. And they do not deserve that. Everyone deserves love and compassion.

Spread love, have an open-mind and stay standing for what you believe in. The rest will follow when they see how happy you are.

the advice : love

the advice : love

Love. Love’s definition is an intense feeling of deep affection. It also strikes fear in many hearts.

Unlike google’s definition, mine is much different. Ever heard of “the click”? Well, that’s what I believe love is. The Click is when you meet a person and either right then and there or over time you get this feeling of pure joy and it’s like a click or a snap. It jolts your sense awake. That raging war between what your heart wants and what your head knows is best suddenly calms like soothing ocean waves and they say to you, “This is going to be something good.” And it will. You know deep down, whether this relationship goes south or turns into smaller, younger versions of yourself and significant in the future, it’s going to be something good. Your eyes light up every time you see their face, your heart pumps a little faster when you’re near them, and everything just seems happier with them. Yeah, you put their feelings above your own and maybe you even have little imaginings of what your future children will look like but it’s so much more than just that. It’s like you’re flying on the outside of atmosphere with them and no one can bring you down.

You also get a sense of fear and a danger alert within that great happiness. It’s a little voice that tells you to hold back, to wait and be patient before you get your hopes and heart broken. Even though you might not listen to that voice, you still think, what if? It carries weight. Don’t listen to that voice.

We all make mistakes, it’s apart of being human. But we also only have one life, so make it worth your while. Whether your relationship with someone that you love or know you are going to love ends badly, just do it. Make it happen, and if you get hurt, I promise you’ll find someone else. Every relationship you’re in, you learn the things you like and the things you don’t like. It prepares you for the next one. When things end, you’ll remember it till the day you die but it’ll be alright. If you seek out the person you want to spend your life with, you’ll find love and happiness.

So love easily, just be careful and make sure you feel the click before getting into a relationship.

how to : let go

how to : let go

Letting go of things isn’t easy. Whether it’s an object, a person or even a being, letting go of them or it, is not easy. Unless you’re a person who can drop all emotions connected to something you once valued, then you understand what I’m saying. Even if we must let go of something that’s only dragging us down, a heavy burden on our shoulders, if the thing we’re holding on to is only damaging us, it is hard road.

I remember when my dog died; a sweet yellow lab with a heart full of gold, not to mention my best and only friend growing up. Even ten years later, I still find myself on the brink of tears just thinking about her because she meant so much to me. In all honesty, dealing with death has never been a strong suit of mine but, then again, it is anyone’s? Even though it wasn’t a choice of mine to let her go, she still left and I had to deal with letting go of her. I had to mentally and emotionally get over the fact that she was gone and she wasn’t coming back to me this time. At five years old, losing your best friend is still not easy, even if it was just a sweet dog.

Letting go of things, of people, who won’t come back is much easier then letting go of people (mostly) who have a chance in returning. Cutting off bad influences in my life has really shaped me into who I am today. The facts are this: I trusted people, I gave them chance after chance, I let people in and they still hurt me. When someone hurts you, whether they betray your trust or just let you down, it feels like the winds being knocked out of you. Like you can’t breathe even though your lungs are full of air, like you’re suffocating but nothing is blocking the oxygen from entering your body. It feels like someone took a sharp icicle and stabbed you in the chest so you aren’t just bleeding but your heart is frozen until it eventually goes numb but even that can’t manage to block out the pain you’ll feel for a long time.

I find that letting go of the worst people is sometimes the most difficult. As humans, it’s natural for us to want to be in an environment where we find ourselves in situations that we can’t predict the outcome of. In places where we don’t always know what’s going on or exactly be safe in, where the adrenaline rushes through our veins and we feel most alive. The people there with us, aren’t always the best type of people though. When we come out of that phase of pure joy and face the reality of our actions, we realize we don’t want to live like this, so we push the people that were there out. Unfortunately, letting go of those people isn’t as easy as one might think. You have to let go of not being able to make more memories with them and being as ecstatic as you were. The memories will fade however into distant thoughts and that’s what helps keep us going.

Then, there are the third type of people you have to let go of: the ones you love but just can’t be around. Everyone has baggage, little things add up to bigger, more chaotic things and then it’s just a personality that has its highs and lows. When someone breaks your trust and hurts you, even if you love them with every fiber in your being, letting go of them is in your best interest because believe me: when they do it once, and you forgive them, they’ll do it all over again. Let them go! I can explain how much better life will be not only for you but also for those who are the people that love and adore you and wont hurt you in the long run. I also cannot stress how much better your life will be without them in it and it will hurt in the beginning but it gets easier with each day. And yes, it will hurt when you look back at it years from now but you won’t regret it. The people you are around today will probably affect who you become in the years to come. Don’t be someone now your future self might regret.

Letting go isn’t easy, whether it’s your choice or not, it leaves a mark on you. But sometimes letting go of people is for the better good. Holding onto things and people that are hurting you don’t deserve the time of day. Let go of them and the pain you feel will follow.

 

first blog post : me

This is the excerpt for your very first post.

Here are a few things you might want to know about myself and what exactly it is I plan to put on my blog which all of this should probably be in the description, or better yet, the about me portion. I find it much easier to put little, simple, cute things in those boxes instead of writing out quirks or the other little, sometimes annoying things about myself. Like, for instance, I wouldn’t put out that I am not at all the person everyone thinks I am. I do think I’m somewhat annoying but not in a “If this girl doesn’t stop talking…” for most people that is. It’s not simple or easy to be the kind of person I want to be.

I want to be extraordinary. I want to stay creative. And most importantly: I want to be positive. A combo of all three plus your usual good-nature personality traits is definitely not easy. Hopefully, a blog will help not only me, but others who want to be like that too; hence the name The Clueless. I want to write about everything from food to sports, from movies to reality shows, from dogs to tigers. I want to write about something that might not be similar in any way to the thing I wanted to write about last week. I want to help and writing is one of the best ways to do that. That’s what my blog will be about.

Back to myself and a few things people might want to know about me are going to come in answers off of basic google questions most asked about someone you’ve just recently met.

1. What’s your full name? Kristina Scout Owen but I go by Scout.

2. Do you own any pets? Two lovely little dogs.

3. What’s your favorite food? Anything Italian.

4. 5 of your favorite movies?  All of the Harry Potter movies; all of the Marvel films; and anything Disney made.

5. Play any sports? Cheer-leading.

6. Top 5 bands? LP, Rainbow Kitten, Sleeping With Sirens, The Lumineers and Red Hot Chili Peppers.

7. Any medical problems? I have diabetes (type one).

8. What’s something that amazes you? People; in both good and bad ways.

9. Favorite thing about yourself? In rare times when chaotic and extreme problems occur, I handle most with flying colors. I defend my friends till they no longer need me or no longer deserve my defending.

10. Least favorite thing about yourself? I don’t let people in which causes me to miss out on good things.

Those are a few things about me that I wanted to share. Stay tuned!